Character Sketch: H. Pious Kjeldsen (P1)

Here, I would like to introduce you to my character Pious Kjeldsen, the character previously mentioned in my Taler du Dansk? post (the Dane!). Forget his name, age, weight etc.- those things can be found out about anyone just my looking at a license. I want to tell you things about him that you would have to learn by really getting to know a person. Habits, hobbies, passions, and other such things. Prepare to meet…Pious Kjeldsen [PIE-yus KYEL-son].

He specializes in the sciences of Cryptography and is in fact a Cryptographic Engineer. He works as a simple coder at his current job, but hopes to move on to something more useful in the future. He strongly distrusts the security of his ATM card and wants to participate in the advancement of card security as a result. Security in general fascinates him and more than once he has been turned out of a store for paying “too much attention” to the security devices posted there. “Can’t a man express interest in his own security in this country? You think you are safe, but you are not! One day, you will see- you will.”

He is, for the most part, a weakling. His only athletic ability is fencing. Oh yes, fencing. A sport that takes close to no brute strength, but a great amount of dexterety and agility, not to mention brains. He spends more time learning to size-up his opponents and take them down using cunning than actually practicing his sword technique. It makes him a decent fencer against the average amateur, but against a professional opponent he will struggle and often fail. It ticks him off to admit it, but his pride and temper are also the cause of his downfall. “If I can best the average man, then I in turn will be above-average in skill and that is enough for me.”

What a mess he lives in. It’s not simply stereotype that such a busy and studious man be messy, it’s a necessity. If his apartment were not as messy as it is, he would find too many things and then he would drown in a neverending sea of things he’s been meaning to work on. His piles of papers, books and folders line the walls like columns reaching nye up to the ceiling. The apartment itself is sparsely furnished. A small futon, a cushion chair, one small coffee table and a selection of do-it-yourself shelving pieces are all completely covered in papers, so that every evening he is forced to swipe them off of his bed to sleep- assuming he sleeps on the futon. Ocassionally he has been known to collapse on the floor in a blanket to sleep. He also has a lamp and a fishtank. The lamp contains a very low-watt “green” lightbulb and the fishtank contains water, rocks and a plant- but no fish. He learned his lesson once. “Fish…they need food and without it, they die. I don’t have time to mourn for a fish everytime I have to…to…not think about feeding it.”


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