The 70’s seen from the perspective of a child of the 90’s

When I think about the 70’s the word that comes to mind is “overbaked”. Everything is sort of yellow-ish (because they didn’t use acid-proof paper to store their photos on) and gross and there’s too many patterns everywhere. I start to think of it like this:

So, you have a tupperware– one of the old kind, from like the 50’s– and it’s got leftovers in it that you are fairly sure are still edible. Well, they’ve been back there a while, but you decide to microwave it first and then make up your mind on whether you can eat it. So, you pop the tupper in the microwave and hit the buttons to make it go.

Then you stand there watching the thing go ’round and ’round in circles, bathed in that same icky yellow light that you’re used to seeing everywhere. And you start to notice that the tupperware appears to be melting slightly- but that’s okay it’s old and you can throw it out later. Except as you watch your future meal turning, you notice movement. Yes, there’s definitely movement- the leftovers are moving. The food is boiling.

And that’s when you realize that the food isn’t boiling- it’s the tupperware that’s boiling and the melting plastic bubbles are causing the food to jerk around like it’s alive- and that’s when you decide that you should have something else for dinner. You stop the microwave, gingerly handle the remains of the melting tupperware and, unable to free it from the glass plate, pitch the whole thing into the trash because that’s just disgusting and it’s totally overbaked.

For good measure, you toss the microwave too because obviously this thing is too old to cook food properly. After all, it’s from the 70’s.

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