If I fail at Digital Storytelling the way I failed at Web Design, what do I have left to fall back on?
What else am I good at?
I picked web design because I’m semi-good at it and I thought that by getting better I could achieve a somewhat-workable balance between doing web design for a career and character design/concept work as a hobby. But then I discovered that the idea of doing web design forever was just depressing because I couldn’t put myself into it 100% and I’m the kind of person that has trouble doing anything if I can’t be passionate about it. So I decided that if I wanted to be 100% passionate about my career I had to pick what I was most interested in. Concept work, character design, storytelling- whatever you want to call it. I never liked the idea of doing what I love as a career, but I like the idea of doing something I hate even less.
But in the event that I suddenly become totally unable to do what I love- well, then what do I do? It’s a pretty depressing thought. I’m not really skilled in much of anything else. My creative abilities have been helping me stumble through every aspect of academia (which is why I’m terrible at almost every aspect of both Mathematics and Science). So, if one day it’s just -poof!- no more creativity, what on earth will I do?
Well, I thought about it long and hard and firmly decided that creativity doesn’t just go -poof!- so I’m safe on that front, but instead what goes -poof!- is something more along the lines of confidence in one’s own abilities. Now, I don’t have much of that to begin with, but I’m going to work harder to improve my own artistic self confidence so I can avoid that -poof!- and get on with life. I’m not really sure how to go about this, but I’m sure that it’s one of those learning experiences that after I’m finished I go “oh, I see what I learned there”.
As a Girl Scout of thirteen years I learned two things that have stuck with me for life: “always be prepared” and “use your resources wisely”. As cliche and overused as these statements have become I stand by them and apply them to every life situation, including my future career goals. I’ve found that as a university student I have resources available to me out the wazoo. Seriously, is there anything that you can’t get help with on campus? I doubt it. As a New Media student I’ve found that there is no greater fountain of resource knowledge than your own academic adviser. At the advice of my adviser (amazing how that works, isn’t it!) I decided to take on a minor in Marketing. DUN-DUN-DUN. Scary, I know.
At this point I want to take a quick break away from what I’m going to do and give you a into what I might have done, if circumstances had been different. I will share with you my secret love for…interior decorating. DUN-DUN-DUN. Oh, wait, sorry- that’s not really appropriate in this case. Well, in short if all other creative things in my life fail me I will probably become an interior decorator. Why? Well, I like colors and customizing things and I like to set a mood using aesthetic principles, so why not? The only reason why I haven’t gone crazy decorating my own room is because I’m too poor to afford to redo it and too lazy to get off my butt and do it in the first place. But I still love to decorate things in any way I can. My grandmother is an interior decorator and I actually picked up a lot of useful knowledge while staying at her superbly decorated condo, when I lived back in California. As it is, I already miss IKEA…maybe I should just move to my fatherland (Sweden, not Ireland) and I’ll be content.
Returning to my original topic, I am in fact not in California or Sweden but Indianapolis, Indiana, which I still haven’t decided whether I sort of like or just hate with a passion. I think the only part of Indy that I enjoy is school…so I think that pretty much sums it up right there. Once I’m out of IUPUI I’m outta’ here, no question. The real question is outta’ here to where? I have no long term goals in that category because I’m the type of person who prefers to float along with the current rather than fight it. Maybe I’ll move back to Texas or California; maybe I’ll set out for Oregon or Seattle; maybe I’ll just forget the USA and move to Denmark or Finland, who knows? Not me, that’s for sure. But for now, Indianapolis. IUPUI. School…Oh god, school…
Sorry I can’t work chronologically at all…maybe I should go back and put things in order?